Straight men let’s face it. We will do anything if we think females will find it attractive. No matter how ludicrous, expensive, or time-consuming it may be, we will do it. The rise of mullets and Camaros in the 80’s can be blamed on women. So is true in nature. Female choice drives the elaboration of male traits. Examples include the male peacock’s splendid tail feathers, the bright colors of male birds and reef fish, and the evolution of horns in dears, beetles, and lizards.
Female Mexican mollies prefer 70’s porn staches. Males in species Poecilia sphenops possess long epidermal filaments on the snout, resembling a mustache. In a recent study, females spent over 60% of their time with stached males instead of their clean-shaven competitors. Females also preferred the same males with soup strainers but not without them. But upper lip plummage isn’t enough. Females preferred larger fish without a crumb catcher as opposed to smaller males with.
So what is the mouthbrow on males good for? Sexual stimulation of the female. At least that is the hypothesis. Mollies require foreplay that involves contact of the male’s snout and the female genital region prior to making whoopee. The elongated snout filaments, aka the 70’s porn stache, may provide both a visual cue for choosing robust males but provide a little extra stimulation.
*The use of slang terms for moustaches in this post is not meant as derogatory commentary on what we consider to be a pinnacle of sophisticated culture. We at DSN salute the moustache and fully support the American Mustache Institute’s mission of “Protecting the rights of, and fighting discrimination against, mustached Americans by promoting the growth, care, and culture of the mustache.”
Schlupp, I., Riesch, R., Tobler, M., Plath, M., Parzefall, J., & Schartl, M. (2010). A novel, sexually selected trait in poeciliid fishes: female preference for mustache-like, rostral filaments in male Poecilia sphenops Behavioral Ecology and Sociobiology DOI: 10.1007/s00265-010-0996-y
i object to your stereotyping of straight males! :-)
I wonder if the female preference for large, mustached males reflected in the total population, with large, mustached males being more likely to reproduce and therefore more likely to have marel offspring that grow to be big and have large mustaches.
I guess not all of us can rise to the high cultural standards of the 70’s & 80’s. Or maybe I’m just jealous that I can’t grow a decent stashe.